Someday My Prince Will Come...maybe.

I'll be honest, I have a massive problem with Disney films and their portrayal of men.

Now, as a female I can admit to a certain Disney film being my favorite film of all time, but I am not proud of it, and will rarely admit it to anyone in the 'real' world. Not because I am ashamed, but because it makes me look like a massive romantic sap...which I also am but that is besides the point.

There are reasons for this, mainly in that us women grow up learning and hoping that one day, a Prince will come and sweep us off our feet, we will get taken away in a beautiful carriage, have talking animals and live happily ever after in a castle.  When in reality, you'll be lucky if you end up with someone remotely sane, with a Ford Mondeo and even then they'll probably run for the hills when they find you singing with your animal friends.

These men may be royalty but even they aren't perfect. A delightful example of this is Prince Charming, how drunk was he not to remember what Cinderella looked like? He spent long enough gazing into her eyes as they waltzed across that impossibly large ballroom. Plus, she left a shoe behind, who does that? I would go back for that shoe, it was literally 2 steps away, and she spent that time dithering about anyway. No man in 2012 would search for you with a shoe, you'd probably get a Craigslist ad, or if he was really bothered a Facebook group/twitter hashtag and he'd forget all about it after 2 pints the next Saturday.

AND they never have anything but perfect hair. If I was a servant/mermaid/soldier/going just around the river bend, my hair would be all over the shop. You can forgive Sleeping Beauty, she didn't move. 

We spend so long searching for 'perfect' when perfect doesn't exist. So does that mean we are all settling, but settling because we can't achieve the unachievable?

For one, chick flicks would be a lot more boring without the happy ever after.

Life would be a lot easier if we were penguins.

You don't always get what you want

I wrote a post in November last year, saved it as a draft and never finished it. I don't even remember writing it but I'm guessing it was one of those 3am 'why am I on this earth' moments.

It goes a little something like this:

If you had asked me how happy I was with my life this time last year, I would have said it was near enough to being perfect. I had an amazing group of friends, a job I loved, University was finally going the way I wanted it to, and I had a happy relationship. Note happy, not perfect.

No relationship is ever perfect, but people like to pretend that their relationship is. And I for, one was guilty of that.

We got together at the end of Freshers Week in our first year of University. A risky strategy, and one that didn't end well. We lived together from the start, though not from choice, his room was 2 doors down from mine. Sometimes I wonder if had we not been forced to live together the relationship would have survived more than a month.

I wrote that 2 months after we had broken up, my heart 80% healed but I was still so angry. The story continues on to him cheating on me multiple times and me not breaking up with him because I had too much other stuff in my head to deal with.

I am one of those people who always appear to be 'strong.' I'm great in difficult situations and don't tend to panic.  The problem with this is that I don't tell people when I'm struggling and boy did I struggle to come to terms with life those last 7 months of Uni.

I lost 3 people I loved dearly, and had been betrayed by the person I thought I would spend the rest of my life with, and I wasn't remotely strong, and I wasn't remotely acting like myself.  Those who knew me best told me I needed to take time out and I just didn't listen, I threw myself in to work and as a result got really ill, I was probably both emotionally and physically exhausted.

I had hit rock bottom and didn't know what to do with myself, I felt like I had lost everything, but now looking back I had gained so much.

I AM strong. I AM capable and I will NEVER EVER let a man tell me I am worthless ever again.
 
 

If at first you don't succeed

I have apparently had this blog since March 2008, who knew?!

That feels like a lifetime ago, and I guess it is, 4 years does a lot to a person.

In March 2008 I was about to take my A Level exams, I was in love with a much older man and I thought a 4 hour shift at work was long. Fast forward 4 years and I am pretty much the same person, except older...and with a degree.

The intervening years were arguably the best of my life. I moved up North for University, met the most amazing group of friends, met a boy who lived in my halls, worked crazy 14 hour shifts, fell in 'love' with said boy, broke up with said boy and am now somehow back at University and living in London.

Life doesn't half take you on a roller coaster (without sounding too much like Ronan Keating.)